I am hoping that by writing this research paper and applying various sociological theories, perspectives and concepts to my personal trouble, I will be able to step back and gain a deeper understanding of an issue that has left me constantly trying to prove to myself and others that I can be better, do better and accomplish more. My continuing struggle with the belief that I am completely incapable of success, despite being a graduating student with a 4.0 grade point average, has resulted in an enormous amount of self-doubt that leaves me questioning my abilities each time I have an assignment to complete. As a result of this exploration, I find that while I do not feel as though I am chasing the wrong things, I do feel as though I am not putting as much effort into those things that mean the most to me. I have realized that I can be successful with both my grades and in my relationships; it is possible to balance the two. Even more, being successful and being perfect are two different things. In the past I have viewed the two as being interchangeable, which is not the case. My definition of being successful has differed as I have realized that it takes more than having perfect grades, but rather living up to my full potential, growing, becoming a better person, maintaining strong relationships, making time for the little pleasures in life, and truly being happy, not only with my accomplishments in school, but outside of it as well.
"4.0: Self-Doubt, the Fear of Failure, and the Power of Symbols,"
Human Architecture: Journal of the Sociology of Self-Knowledge:
2, Article 14.
Available at: http://scholarworks.umb.edu/humanarchitecture/vol6/iss2/14